one of the hardest things about working as an editorial photographer is learning to let go. many times, editing falls outside of your realm of control, styling often does and then the possibility of pouring your soul into a shoot and have it not run - well there's the clincher. above is the entire spread i shot this summer for a magazine that sadly did not publish the images. it happens to all of us - but it never gets easier. when i realized there was no longer a reason to not share - i decided i HAD to share. my soul - my heart - is in everyone of these frames. i shot this spread on Impossible Project's film and I could not be happier - nor more moved by the magic and ethereal beauty of the photographs. of course, it helped having a gaggle of gorgeous little beauties to photograph who all belong to some of my favorite people in the whole world.

but i also wanted to show you these images because they are me. i have two packs of polaroid 600 film left. it hurts my heart. i associated that film so closely with my own eye - i could not distinguish the two. the reality of it is crushing down on me and i've realized it's not only affected me - but my work. i've been lost somewhere in the mix of shooting weddings and food, writing books (all of which i love), and moving all over the country, that i forgot what i truly loved to photograph. you see the answer above - beautiful children on instant film. it's time for me to refocus, to be true to my vision and shoot again for myself. thank you Impossible for making that possible.

*edited to say: this shoot would not have been possible without the incredibly beautiful floral pieces designed by the floral lab - thank you lady! *

Comments

[kristen]

i feel really attached to 600 film and have 1 box + 2 shots in my 680 left. I've been trying to not feel so attached to that box in the fridge and just want to shoot it, but feel the rite of passage when it's finally done.
beautiful portraits - i love what's happening with the impossible film.

[Fernanda]

ohh, my! this are the most beautiful shots i've seen on impossible film! thanks jen for sharing! ❤
ps- i can TOTALLY relate to how you feel..the polaroid heartache..getting lost in the way..finding oneself back..

[brooke]

they were complete nincompoops not to publish these incredible images. I'm glad that you got inspired by this amazing shoot to refocus and clarify what brings you that inner *whoosh*.

cause that is what life is about.

[Joy]

so adorable! is there absolutely no way to get more film?

[rachel]

Oh Jen, stunning. But I am not surprised, since you always blow me away. I haven't shot my sx-70 in over a year and keep hoping new film will come soon. And you know, every morning when I make my coffee I look at one of your pikas hanging on the wall. Xo, Rach

[Lauren]

This post both makes me smile and breaks my heart. I've been adoring your photos/blog/world from afar for quite a while, and thought I should say hello. I hate that our world has less access to "instant" beauty. Thank you for keeping the dream alive for so long.

Lauren (theurbanhippie.wordpress.com)

[jen]

kristen - cherish it lady - but don't wait too long - mine is going really yellow :(

fer - i love you. xo

brooke - thank you, thank you.

joy - sadly no - what's left on the market is disgustingly overpriced and over two past it's expiration date

rachel - thank you lady. and i love that ;) xo

lauren - thank you so much for saying hello and for your lovely words...

xoox

[jen]

so glad you posted these, they are stunning.

[kim]

These are just stunning. I'm so glad you took the time to share these because I love them! XO

[jen]

thank you jen and kim! xo

[shaylah fawn deviney]

the darling girls, the light, the flowers, the film; all undeniably beautiful & glorious.

[patricia]

so inspiring, keep it up girl! xo

[Affordable Medical Insurance]

I've been adoring your photos/blog/world from afar for quite a while, and thought I should say hello. I hate that our world has less access to "instant" beauty. Thank you for keeping the dream alive for so long.

[jen]

thank you ladies so much - the film is pretty special and i feel really lucky to be able to shoot it... xo

[mary catherine]

such a gorgeous series...the flowers, the sweet faces, perfect. you should be so proud of this work! you have a gift.

[jen]

thank you mc - that is amazingly kind for you to say... xo

[the purcells]

These are SO beautiful Jen! Great post on finding time to do and make what you really love despite outside influences - wonderful reminder to stay true to ourselves!

[jen]

thank you carrie - it feels good - like coming full circle ;)

[Carol]

I felt such a deep sense of sadness when I shot my very last box of 600 film last year. Although TZ Artistic kept me happy for a while, I still missed the 600. As a consequence, I find myself not indulging in my love of photography half as much as I used to, but I have promised myself that I will at least start buying TIP film more often now. I'm completely in love with the Silver Shade UV+ film.

Jen, I sincerely mean this. You have been a huge inspiration to me. Your work adorns my walls and I love seeing it there.

I look forward to seeing all of your future work.

[jen]

thank you so much carol. i actually answered some interview questions recently about shooting this new film. as i was responding a thought occurred to me - i really, REALLY love the challenge. i think if we can step back, realize that it's just not (obviously) 600 film, and start seeing it for what it is, you will find a creative breakthrough. the film has beautiful tones, and i'm learning to embrace the inconsistencies as gorgeous little flaws that add to the composition. digital perfection is such a bore - we need more film like this - film that will surprise us ;) xo

[Carol]

I agree that the tones are amazing! I've yet to sample any of the color stuff yet. Maybe soon.

I find digital so uninspiring I still have images sitting on my computer from 2 months ago that I need to edit for a friend.

[lisa]

found you from design mom. for my work I used to use polaroids and i just cleaned out a closet and found a pack of 600 film. checked on ebay and thought of selling it there - but honestly if you want it i will send it to you as a gift.

let me know
lisa