those first steps - when your first born tip toes towards you with hesitation and you begin to clap in bliss - she looks at you, her eyes full of hope, a touch of pride and utter delight, it is one of the greatest moments in your life. you have both worked so very hard for that day, and in a way, you felt as if it could not have come soon enough.
and then your second child takes her first steps. though you tried to work with her as much, there was some hesitation on both of your parts. "do i really want two of them running about the house already?" your mind leaps ahead; and she wonders if this is really worth it, after all, she is a speed crawling champion and surely she can catch her sister faster on hands and knees...
and there is the most bittersweet moment. when your youngest child takes her first steps. she has done this on her own, she is an independent spirit and one whose own pace, found her cruising earlier than you would like. and is it the fact that there are three of them on the move that has me a touched concerned? no, it is the fact that this is the last of those moments, she is the last born, she is my baby, i still insist on rocking her to sleep every night, on spoon feeding her yogurt and cheerios in the morning {while i would have let the older girls dive into it with reckless abandon at this age} - she is my baby, and while i have learned to let go a little bit more with each of them, i can not let go of her quite yet - i am not ready for her to be a toddler. those quiet moments in the early evening as i rock her to sleep, her head gently pushing back and forth deeper into the crook of my arm - her lids heavy - a happy, tired smirk on her lips - is my sweet little heaven - i am not ready to let go...
hold them, hug them, squeeze them, cover them in kisses every moment, for they are fleeting...
xoox~jla
Oh. we are so similar. Three children in 3 1/2 years. My youngest is 2 and I am still holding on, although she has done things sooner than the rest. She's still my baby and will be.
Posted by: Jen | Wednesday, 30 July 2008 at 03:15 PM
This post makes me long for a baby of my own - I can't wait for the excitement of first steps, even if it is tinged with a little sadness. Your girls are adorable - keep cherishing their every accomplishment :)
Posted by: Katie | Wednesday, 30 July 2008 at 03:18 PM
This brings tears to my eyes. Your writing is so beautiful. My baby just turned 3 yesterday, and while we celebrated "our big boy" there was just a bit of sadness in me of how quickly we came to this point.
Posted by: alicia | Wednesday, 30 July 2008 at 03:51 PM
Beautifully written. My son will soon be turning two. My husband and I planned to have just one child, but oh how I would love to have more...The beauty and adventure that children bring is such a blessing.
Posted by: krista | Wednesday, 30 July 2008 at 04:09 PM
What a beautiful post. The moments truly are fleeting. With this next baby I hope I dont rush all the milestones as I did with my first.
Posted by: Stefanie | Wednesday, 30 July 2008 at 06:17 PM
so beautifully said and so so true.
I have a hard time with the fact of never having this time again. Good thing there are always more new firsts:)
xo
Posted by: martha | Wednesday, 30 July 2008 at 09:30 PM
Jen, I am right here with you. Sam is two now and because he is my last baby, I don't want him to grow up! His big accomplishments, while I stand in awe and am amazed and happy to be there, are also a bit hard for me to watch....because with each one, I know his years as my baby are fleeting, as you said. Yes, it is truly so bittersweet! :-)
Posted by: Anna | Wednesday, 30 July 2008 at 11:37 PM
i agree with you, it's so hard to let them be indipendent and let tem grow... i feel the same with my children.... but they do it anyway... the life has so strong energy. the life goes on anyway, and then i'm so proud of them. have a nice day.
Posted by: kosenrufu mama | Thursday, 31 July 2008 at 03:19 AM
Gosh, I'm a bit teary. Our first and only is barely one and this post makes my heart flutter. I get so excited for each of her incredible moments but I get a bit teary eyed to think her infant stage is over. It makes me yearn for a small village of babies. Beautifully written...thanks!
Posted by: Carla M. M. | Friday, 01 August 2008 at 10:01 PM
i so understand this feeling. my littlest turned 1 on 7.29, and has been walking since 10 mos. i haven't really forgiven him for trying to grow up so fast.
Posted by: lisa truesdell | Saturday, 02 August 2008 at 08:32 PM
This little sweet story touched me so much.
Although i don't have children myself (yet) i can imagine your feelings.
Beautiful and tough feelings at the same time..
Posted by: Mila | Sunday, 03 August 2008 at 04:27 PM
made me cry...
Posted by: lyckoskatt | Friday, 08 August 2008 at 03:10 PM
made me cry...
Posted by: lyckoskatt | Friday, 08 August 2008 at 03:10 PM
Ah, very sweet!
Posted by: Toast 2 Mom | Monday, 11 August 2008 at 11:10 PM